Why Tri? (Some Thoughts on Motivation)

I've been reflecting quite a bit in the last couple of weeks about triathlon and motivation and I thought I'd throw some of my thoughts down here. First though, I want to say thank you to the folks who contacted me after Longhorn - I appreciate the advice and kind, kind words - thank you! I also received the question: why put yourself out there like that, you big whiner? I fully admit that I might have sounded like a bratty child throwing a temper tantrum about a day that didn't go the way I wanted it to. But I feel like it's important in the documentation of my journey to not only publish the awesome stuff, but to describe the bad days too, because it's honest.

So in the aftermath of the "bad day," (which after some reflection, really didn't turn out to be so bad) I'm here thinking about triathlon and what it means to me and why do I do it anyway. Dawn had Shelly and me answer this question when we began training for our first Ironman. We both struggled with it for weeks (What does it meaaaaan!?), and we were surprised to find out that simply "to find out if I can" is a sufficient answer if it means something to you.

The problem is that after you find out that you can, the question becomes "Now what?" or I guess, "Now why?" So now I'm sitting here questioning: why do I do triathlon? Why am I trying to go faster? What is going to keep me motivated to continue to push myself, to get up early to train, to (try really hard to) eat right all the time, to go to bed early every night, to make it hurt in training, to NOT QUIT when a workout isn't going the way I want it to, to repeatedly choose exercise or sleep over social events, to stay positive, to keep running, swimming, biking? I need this answer because I need to know and understand what motivates me. I need to reach and hold on to it when it gets tough, whether during training or racing.

In a conversation with Robert last week, I came to the answer: I want to be great at something. Not just good. I'm "okay" at lots of things, but I want to be really great at something. I don't think "something" necessarily has to be triathlon, but that's what I've picked, which is lucky because I truly can say that I love to train! That's a good thing because clearly "to be great" also requires "to do a whole lot of hard work."

Then the question is: how do you define great? A while back, "great" was to FINISH a 10K, marathon, short course triathlon, Ironman. Now, it would be absolutely absurd for me to say "I want to qualify for Kona/70.3 Worlds" or "I want to win my age group." I'm all about striving for attainable goals, and those are completely out of reach for me. But maybe, just maybe, one day they won't be. The great thing about triathlon is that it truly is a lifetime sport. So "being great" will mean being better than yesterday, every day. This is something I can work with. Onward!